COST OF THE 21ST CENTURY NIKKAH

The Deen that we follow asks certain conditions for a nikkah to be considered valid .High up on the list is the presence of witnesses. A ceremony is usually also not out of place.
One controversial issue has always been striking a balance between the cost as seen from the bride's perspective and the groom's perspective. There is the place of family complications too in the form of authoritative inputs. In the end, the cost of initiating the union skyrockets.
We, unfortunately have also evolved into a people sworn to make things more difficult for ourselves. We follow trends blindly in clothes,venues, choice of souvenirs, everything !
YOLO we say, or YOMO in this case (You Only Marry Once).
Well, YOMO is the reason a lot of people spend the first two years (or more) of their new lives paying back debts. Needless debt.
Some people are wealthy and can afford to throw big gigs. As much as one wants to avoid blowing things out of proportion, you really cannot fault a person spending what he has legally earned even if that feels too much to some (something will always feel too much to someone).
The issue is with the people who cannot adjust to their pockets. The people who think the size of the ceremony is a statement of love and affection.
A bride arriving in a Rolls royce will naturally feel better than the same bride arriving in a Peugeot but what if the bride cannot afford a Rolls Royce? Simple......push it on the Groom !
Ladies today go home and in the process of trying to paint a would be groom as adequate forget to apply caution. They end up painting a fictional character which the man is then forced to conform to.
A man who earns the equivalent of $500 monthly is then asked to service a $10,000 wedding ceremony that starts at dawn and ends before dusk.
Some people aren't that unkind though, they consider their partners and keep him away from the pressure. Instead, they turn the upcoming event into a business where people are forced to 'subscribe' to in the form of clothes bought. The type of cloth you buy decides where you seat, what you eat and how you are treated. Oh, yes, it also affects what type of souvenir you get.
All of this, just to create an impression which does little or nothing positive to the actual life to follow.
Whatever happened to people being themselves? I know it is a wedding, I also know you well enough to get an invite. That means I should not be one you'd pretend to.
But who wants that? that's not fun.
What we have now is young men being handed the "project nikkah". The proposal will be submitted then they would review and respond with a statement of acceptance/rejection stating time frame and reasons. For some unlucky ones, the waiting period usually leads to project cancellation.
You get a card one morning inviting you to the commissioning of your project. This happens!!!!!
Weddings are important, the ceremony is nice to have, the memories are wonderful. But that's all it will become, a memory.
If only we could spend more time planning for marriages that we did on wedding ceremonies.......
Are you a man? what exactly is the cost of  wedding today? Suddenly full grown men revert to being boys. Boys do what boys do.
That summary right there is why a lot of weddings haven't taken place. Luckily people are beginning to accept (by force) that less is more in this case.
Think about it, all this while, Islam had us covered !!! It's funny how the sunnah trends eventually.